We are pretty careful with our money. We run our business accounts in credit, pay off our credit cards every month and only borrow for cars and houses.
We also take the trouble to move money between our business current account and business savings account so we can pay our taxes and divs when we need to.
Ah, what good little business people we are.
As a result it was with some surprise we received a letter from our bankers. I won’t tell you which one of the fine upstanding institutions we bank with but they’re based in Scotland and don’t have the word ‘Royal’ in the title.
Anyway, back to the letter, which arrived last week.
The letter said something along the lines of ‘we want to reassure you, because your accounts are all in credit, that your money is entirely safe and nothing is going to happen to it.’
‘Yes, your money is safe. You don’t need to worry about someone stealing it, the bank going bust or making stupid lending decisions.’
‘Well, we just thought we’d tell you. You know, to reassure you… and all that.’
Up until the moment I read the letter, even in these times, it hadn’t even crossed my mind that our credit balances might be at risk. Not in the Bank of Scotland (whoops, I’ve said it). After all the Bank of Scotland is hardly domiciled in Iceland, is it? Is it?
So, the letter we received was entirely counter productive.
Never mind. These things happen and I forgot about the letter until last night when I received a ‘phone call which went something like this:
‘Hello is that Mr Mackay?’ My wife’s name is Mackay and I’m now very used to being Mr Renee Mackay.
It’s Alison from the Bank of Scotland.’
‘Okay… well done.’
‘I notice you have some savings and wonder if we can have a savings review because you’re not getting the best rate you can (no shit, Sherlock) and we have some bonds that will pay you more.’
‘Errrr… confused. Are you talking about our business accounts?’
‘No, your personal accounts.’
‘We don’t have any personal accounts with you.’
‘Errrrrrrrrr… errrrrrrrr… right. Is that Mrs Mary Mackay.’
‘Nope. Do you think you might have a wrong number?’
I’m no longer quite so confident about our accounts and wonder if the letter might have been well timed after all.