Mr. Angry is new police deputy

“Friends” cried Mr. Angry at the Sunday gathering of his adoring fans at the Moaning Cow public house “this is the proudest moment of my life.”

“You said that when you came out of prison” yelled a man by the fruit machine.

“I’m to be appointed by the new Police and Crime Commissioner as his special adviser on crime prevention.”

There was a stunned silence as, even by his amazing track record, Mr. Angry had managed to shock a community.

“Yes” said a rather thoughtful drinker “there’s an article in the paper saying that these new commissioners are giving jobs to their mates. Salaries up to £68,000 annually. I read that a Labour councillor in the West Midlands is getting £65,000 for a 32-hour working week together with £27,000 per year for her council jobs.”

“Friends” yelled Mr. Angry. “I’m sure there is the odd bad example but I’ll be setting new standards of commitment.”

“And there’s an ex mayor of Ely who will get £28,000 annually for two days a week because he has experience of local government” continued the paper reader.

“My PCC is one of 41 that are meeting the Home Secretary” said Mr. Angry. “I’m sure she’ll make sure that budgets are properly spent.”

“She’ll be telling them that police budgets have to fall by £2.4 billion by 2015” observed Mrs. Angry who had been reading her copy of ‘The Sun’.

“I shall play my part in ensuring that your money, you the tax payer, is spent properly” continued Mr. Angry.

“How do you know that you’re getting this job” asked a fan.

“I had a call from the police. They said the new commissioner wanted to discuss with me cutting crime in this town. He mentioned something about his deputy.”

“Mr. Angry” shouted Rita the barmaid. “It’s the deputy police commissioner on the phone. He says have you agreed to leave the area to help the fight against crime.”

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