Too much of a good thing

I feel like a bit of a moaning Minnie…

Moaning Minnie?

That’s right up there with whoopsy daisy and jolly good show as phrases that belong to a simpler time.

So why am I… well, one of those things that I just mentioned?

I’m always banging on about customer service and how people don’t engage in conversation but grunt as they take your money and then slap the change down on the counter.

On Saturday, the reverse was true.

I was buying birthday card and because I’m a kind and considerate person and I had in no way left it to last minutes, I was buying it from Morrison’s.

That’s as may be, but they had a good selection of cards and I chose one with the iconic picture of Audrey Hepburn on it; her beautiful face filling the whole of the card. A suitable homage to the lovely lady I was buying it for.

I took my card to the checkout and, only having this one item I was able to join the ’10 Items Or Less’ queue. There wasn’t a self service offering in the supermarket. If there was I would have used it.

Anyway, it was my turn and I handed over my card and offered the £3.75 this piece of thick paper was clearly worth. It was only then I made eye contact with the lady operating the checkout…

Well, eye contact was a bit of a misnomer because she was staring, all dewy eyed, at the card I was trying to buy.

‘Oh, I love her,’ she purred at me and then proceeded to read the reverse of the card on which was printed a short biography of said iconic Hollywood star. Actually, it didn’t seem so short when I was standing in the queue, which was being swelled by disgruntled shoppers by the second.

My attention was brought back to the checkout lady. ‘Ooooh’, said she. ‘She was born in 1929. I didn’t know that, did you?’

I mumbled that I didn’t, really embarrassed by the nasty looks I was getting from the other shoppers. I longed to tell them that it wasn’t me engaging in this pointless conversation and I longed to say to the lady that actually I was in a bit of a hurry and could I have my card now that I’d paid for it… but I didn’t.

With great relief (on my part at least) she snapped out of her reverie and handed me the card. But couldn’t resist a parting word. ‘I’ve got every one of her films on DVD, have you?’

I mumble that I hadn’t and scarpered, pretty sharpish I can tell you.

Okay, I know that I’m a moaning Minnie and engagement with your customers is a good thing. But this was self indulgence, not engagement.

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