Mr. Angry loses the will to live

In a week in which the economic news nose-dived and the Chancellor just about missed all his targets Mr. Angry spent much of his time thinking about Miriam Gonzalez Durantez.

The wife of the deputy Prime Minister made a statement in favour of quotas to get more women to the top of British companies. She then said “I hate quotas”. This convinced Mr. Angry that she was right to marry a Liberal Democrat as it ensured she spent her life dithering. The rest of what she said is irrelevant.

Mr. Angry was then pole-axed by the decision to publish the first results from the Office for National Statistics in its attempt to measure national happiness. Only a PM such as Dave could allow this to happen in a week when his Chancellor admitted real personal incomes will fall by £2,500 this year.

“Even those unemployed were found to be almost as content as those in work” was a statement suggesting Ian Duncan Smith should be sacked (quite a good idea actually) or the survey has undertones of Tony Blair’s Iraq dossier.

Mr. Angry summed the matter up in his usual eloquent way. “Free beer, loads of credit and my unemployment payment: that’s what makes me happy.”

Then he realised that was what the survey showed.

“Re-instate Ian Duncan Smith” he cried as he completely lost the plot.

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