The Enterprise Britain guide to sex

Can I please ask the four million members of Enterprise Britain to interrupt their Easter holiday (actually about 3.3m are at work trying to drive their businesses out of recession).

I am going to publish…wait for it….

THE ENTERPRISE BRITAIN GUIDE TO SEX

Actually I’m not. I’m going to talk about cash flow but I realised that you might switch off. There is a connection.

The latest Enterprise Britain poll has revealed that 99.6% of men and 88% of women spend more time in bed thinking about cash flow than about sex. It really is a turn-off:

HER: “Darling, please run your fingers over my body and tell me you love me.”
HIM: “I think Warings might pay the October invoice tomorrow”.

More seriously:

HER: “Darling, do you think our love making could last more than five minutes”
HIM: “Bloody Warings have taken five months credit. Bastards! What did you say….”

Terminally:

HER: “What was that?”

It is almost impossible to meet any Enterprise Britain owner/manager without the subject of cash flow becoming a dominating theme. At the heart of the issue are the following factors:

1. Inadequate capital structures partly due to the lack of risk capital available for smaller businesses.

2. The British disease of not paying bills.

3. Banks…no, let’s have Easter off from that subject.

And much more.

Over the next few weeks we’ll look at these issues.

For now, Happy Easter.

HER: “Darling, stop teasing me. Where have you hidden my Easter Egg?”
HIM: “snoooozzzzzzzzzz………..”

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